I'm not who I was

One of Brandon Heath’s first big hits was a song called “I’m Not Who I Was.” Those lyrics have been running through my head as I’ve been reflecting on my time in Kenya and Uganda this summer and prepare to fly home tonight.

I didn’t expect to change so much. I’ve been to Kenya twice already, so I didn’t think I’d experience anything drastically different enough to really change me. But it’s impossible to get on an airplane alone, flying into the unknown, and stay the same. It’s impossible to move in with strangers who become family for five weeks and stay the same. It’s impossible to give your heart to a hundred children and have it shattered time and again as you learn their stories and stay the same. It’s impossible to face one fear after another until you’re no longer afraid and stay the same. It’s impossible to follow the call of a living, loving God and stay the same.

As always, I am leaving a part of my heart here in Kenya.  It’s a larger piece this time, so it’s harder to leave this time, but I can’t wait to get back and share even more stories with friends and family in my first home.  And I’ll be praying for time to pass quickly until God calls me back to my second home.

The thing I find most amazing in amazing grace
Is the chance to give it out.
Maybe that’s what life is all about.